Thursday, 14 April 2011

Pets...

A couple of weeks ago, the Railway Man received this email (without the photo's) and I've been meaning to share it with you. You know the story though, too much happening and I forgot all about it until I was cleaning out my gmail and realised that he'd forwarded it on to me. So for all my animal loving friends, enjoy...


"Note found taped low down on the 'fridge door....


To my pets,


The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. the other dishes are mine and contain my food...
Placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Racing me to
the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster
than you can run.

 I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this.
 Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort,
 however. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is
 not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other, stretched out to the
 fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and
 having tongues hanging out on the other end to maximize space is
 nothing but sarcasm..

For the last time, there is no secret exit from the bathroom! If, by some miracle, I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge in an attempt to open the door. I must exit through the same door I entered.
Also, I have been using the bathroom for years - canine/feline attendance is not required.

The proper order for kissing is: Kiss me first, then go smell the other dog or
cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

Finally, in fairness, dear pets, I have posted the following message on the front door:


TO ALL NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT AND LIKE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT OUR PETS:


(1) They live here. You don't.


(2) If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay


off the furniture. That's why they call it 'fur'-niture.


(3) I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.


(4) To you, they are animals. To me, they are adopted sons/daughters who


are short, hairy, walk on all fours and don't speak clearly.


Remember, dogs and cats are better than kids because they:


(1) eat less,


(2) don't ask for money all the time,


(3) are easier to train,


(4) normally come when called,


(5) never ask to drive the car,


(6) don't smoke or drink,


(7) don't want to wear your clothes,


(8) don't have to buy the latest fashions,


(9) don't need a gazillion dollars for college and


(10) if they get pregnant, you can sell their children    "



Photo's courtesy of me  :o)

To understand JUST how apt this is I have to tell you that this is a man who when he gets home greets the dogs and THEN me  :o)
xxx

23 comments:

Annie said...

LOVE it Lizzie, love it love it love it

dragonfly gypsy said...

Very good Lizzie. The reason our Husbands say hello to our dogs first is because they have beaten us to the door. Our Gucci even beats my Mother-in-Law when she is here. Cheers Sharron

Sue said...

So cute and I just love all the pics.

Fiona said...

I love it Lizzie - So so true in our house too. Hugs - Fee XX

Margaret said...

I love it!!! And how cute that your man greets the fur babies first. :D

Jeanette said...

Love it Lizzie. Thanks for posting it. The pics added to the story. Hugs,

Cherry Red Quilter said...

Don't feel bad about your husband greeting the pets before you! When my mother came to stay in time for my wedding yers ago my then husband to be met her at the airport and I waited at home. When she came in she only had eyes fo rmy puppy......and then for me!

Sew Useful Designs said...

Hi Lizzie!

Yep - my hubby greets our pup first, children second, and I'm last on the list... after he has been kissed to death that is!!

Loved this post!

Hugs! Vikki xoxo

Melody said...

What a wonderful post. It made me smile the whole way through. Thank you.

taylorsoutback said...

Oh this is simply delightful! Ending my long day with a smile - thank you. Thought I was the only one who had a husband who greeted our pooches first...plus when HE leaves and goes somewhere - They howl like wolves - so mournful..they don't do that for me. Go figure!

Sandra Henderson said...

Now, that is the truth! I love this!
We have a king bed and the pups have 90%! I stay on the edge... Then we have all this furniture and i get up from my chair to take a sewi g break and cant get back in when i return. Lol
One day my usband was eating a piece of fried chicken ad the phne rang. Welll, he sat back down and no chicken! Lol
He went to our bed and there they were...happily sharing.
Oh goodness. Wed be lost without them.

Anne-Lise at Rag, Tag, Bobtail said...

Love it, Lizzie. Thanks for bringing out smiles! And yes, he does geet the dogs first - i've given up that one. Hugs to you and the furbabies.

Julie said...

love it lizzie! i have been known to steer people away from my couch so my puppy wouldn't get upset and jump off. he has his little blankie there.
yes, i take things too far at times, but oh well. lol
xox

Julie said...

Thats great Lizzie. I love the last bit. xx

Pat said...

This is brilliant and so true. I thought our cats and dogs were unique but obviously not. Glad there are other mad about their pets owners out there too.

I'm gonna tell Mom! said...

Sounds just like our house!
kim

Sew Create It - Jane said...

That made me smile! thanks for the giggle!

...Miss...Maddie's... said...

Love this pet post and of course your beautiful quilt work.
Susan

Pokey said...

I AM that pet lover! :-}pokey

Francien said...

So true Lizzie....i can agree on all the points...infact..i could have wrote it...love it...
and in this house i always get rundown by Meisje so my husband has to greet her first..ALWAYS..even if she is in the garden or upstairs,..she just feels him coming i guess..have a nice weekend ...greetings Francien.

Kate said...

I make it a point NOT to race to the door at the first sound of a key turn and shamelessly cry, bark and run in circles begging for attention - that's why our dog and cat get the first kisses.

Perhaps if I were more pushy.....
sigh. Loved your photos!

Karen said...

My dad would love this too - I think he worries more about his dog than his three daughters - probably loves us all the same though!

Leanne said...

Absolutely fantastic, as I sit here watching my Jack Russell sitting in the garden under a tree waititng for a baby blackbird to fall in her mouth. If I could find a by product for dog fur I would be a rich women.

LinkWithin

Blog Widget by LinkWithin